Another week,  since last time i got back from Songjiang for an external-implement project, i had done with little related with working but just wandering about among my tech docs and books, on every single work day. Maybe my boss and manager should fire me, if they find out that that guy's just reading all day, no work:) Ok, as i know, also from other programmer's words, in IT, we programmers do work for the 30%-50% of daily working time, and the rest is for somekind of bugout. For example, you can read more tech materials, docs, which's a optimistic way, and you can also do whatever you want to, relaxing, chatting, guys you are free. Well, maybe we dont have a good professional attitude, loyalty with the counterpartner in foreign districts, but that's the rule here. There's a feeling that i am not that young guy with pure thought on career and people relations, and also my faith to the company. Actually, i've made some try-outs with some hunters, and post resume to others, like my bro in another IT company' saying, we are all astir with leaving. Well, maybe it's time to go, after 2 whole years' serve, and i'd want a wide scope in profession, and big stage. Then, where's my next station? See, man, you'd prepare more and sometimes you have to be the "big fish" to let them recognize you. God.... hard to leave and hard to hunt for another chance.

 

Ok, patient. Someday later, my speaking course'll start, hope it can change my poor pronounciation and hiphop-like disorderly grammer.

 

Then, it's also a good week for summer activities. I had gone swimming for 2 days, each right after my dismissing time, and 2 day for basketball. It's a little bit effective to shrink my booming kyte and waist, haha. Hey, that guy in Australia, who's well known for not having ball-playing after a certain long days, are you the same embarrassed with such situation? Yeah, we are growning old, and avoidlessly growing those parts we dont want to.

 

Well, also best wishes for my friend in the wild wild west, who's surfuring under the condition with no meet, no bathing, mounts of dust. She's a good guy, i mean most kind and bravura, to volunteer and teach those children there. It's not every of us can make such dicision with no regarding of the real factors. Hope she back soon, everything goes well.

 

It's closer for that Goddamit Olympics, and most corners on road are filled more and more cops, dogs, and terrible policewoment... Oh, nealy forgot those missile carts right on the express way!!! God, it did shock me at the first glance, and the first time ever~

Yes! What's the last time you gotta flat tire? Yes! Two weeks ago. The fouth time ever, since the past 2 months. Yes! one time for a sharp nail, one for glass pieces, one for sth i dont know, and what's the cause this time? Yes! bad luck's not your fault, but frequently chosen as the dog, hum? Is god playing sth with me? Or just wantted to tell me that- hey, man, just show me that crazy metre by metre bike-moving.

 

Yes! I know that way i back home and go working everyday's tough, really tough! Yes! I know for the goddamit World Expo here in 2010, the road's always in a clutter with nails, glass pieces, iron strips. Yes! and that goddamit dust! Yes! And that's the reason i can undertake the fact of my poor tires? Yes! Goddamit the underrailway lines are the right partener with me, to some extend, for i can meet most of those construction fields of goddamit metro line. Yes! I neally forgot goddamit the government, especially in this Putuo area. The most famous road called Jiaotong, which never can be done and completed. Yes! Every year, when i passed that goddamit Jiaotong Road, guess what? Stones, holes, and noise of drilling, today they repair this part, next day, they turned to another part. Part by part, round by round, the next year, they would get back the same part and set up another construction.

 

Yes! Oh, i forgot the goddamit bombing in KunMing, YunNan. Yes! Along with that goddamit Olympics, terrorists would show us kinds of means to impress us, shake us or somekind of waking up us. Yes! Goddamit, this year, so many tough things, guys, nations, idiots, they all take this goddamit Olympics as a platform to fulfill those illusions. Yes! Goddamit, also this year, the conflict between "party" and many goes more firece, and as i pointed out- No pain no gain.

 

Yes! I gotta flat tire again, and again i have to stop my bike, pumping tires again, then make hey while the sun shines. After leaking out, again i stop to pump tires, then again continue... Yes! Goddamit, I cant bear this embarrased situation, but i have to. Now, finnally, i'm back. Yes! Goddamit, I'm delighted that i can push my bike home.

 

Yes! I wrote these here, but not only writing, i was shouting! Yes! Goddamit, I gotta flat tire again!!!

 

    Hot, Sunshining, thundershower, I could still remember that rainning Summer vocations, on that old playground, playing basketball or football with my guys. That fancy image gives me a lot laughters and energy, which, can draw me back a little bit from this air-conditioned building, far from keying codes on my screen. But everyone chooses his ideal, right? than god promise him or her the corresponding life.

    As one of my friend, who just took off last week, for Japan, the other side of the ocrean, and enjoying her hiking tour right now, right there. Between lines of the journey logs, i feel a certain desire to the nature, peaceful life style and an indepent thought way with her unyielding heart.

    Frankly, during my collegehood, i could not only ever once thought about the beautiful Tibet, Lijiang, and those length and breadth of deserts, but ended with nothing. I could not even manage a jaunt within Yangzi delta, hehe:) What a pity, but that's my choice, even if god could offer me another chance, i sure made the same choice.

    Ideal, yes, everyone gotta this object, but differs each other. May god show his mercy to those blessed ideals, and those who hold lights deep in hearts.

    Finnally, one song from Kokia, 'the bird of night', from Japan. Wish my friend everything good there and find the true beauty of life there.

 

 

 

 

 

 

   

 

    多久了？不知道，但是依稀能记得那么的喜欢BSB(Back Street Boys)的时候还是初中的时候，初三，对，那个柔和了疯狂和压抑的中考日子，那些个补课的日日夜夜，以及那些仅存在脑海中的点滴。。。

    13年了，从预备班到现在，每个人的人生都有道坎，或许几道，不过在我这边，离开小学过去的学校转来这边的预备班，就是道坎，从此过去了13年，逐渐的人格化了自己，也模版化了将来的自己。

    在那个朦胧的时候，非常喜欢沉醉在BSB的抒情R&B, Blues中，喜欢主唱(那个矮个，Howie)在情歌高昂时的呐喊，不似金属的狂躁，但有情到深处迸发的悸动。周末在家做完作业，放入盘CD，把音响调制蚊子般的声音，但只有一旁的自己能听到，便靠了柜子，坐在地上，边看《三国演义》边聆听BSB的耳语。呵呵，放在现在，也许很难有机会和心境能那么重新来过了。

    在去松江做项目的路上，偶然间听到了驾驶员播放的《show me the meaning of being lonely》，感叹其品位，也勾起了我对过去的思忆。呵呵，过去了13年了，后来就不知怎的忘记了BSB，也或者将这段记忆封存了起来。感谢这位好心的司机，让我能对过去的旧物翻个出来，略微整待，擦拭干净后等待重新封存。

    回想起来，BSB也解散很久了，上了大学后就没有再怎么听BSB的歌，就像过去的高中，初中一样，封存了。Ok, anyway, life's going on, hum? 贴些歌词，以示怀念BSB .

 

 

    Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely
So many words for the broken heart
It's hard to see in a crimson love
So hard to breathe
Walk with me and maybe
Nights of light so soon become
Wild and free I could feel the sun
Your every wish will be done They tell me
Show me the meaning of being lonely
Is this the feeling I need to walk with
Tell me why
I can't be there where you are
There's something missing in my heart
Life goes on as it never ends Eyes
of stone observe the trends
They never say forever gaze Guilty
roads to an endless love
There's no control Are you with me now
Your every wish will be done
They tell me
Show me the meaning of being lonely
Is this the feeling I need to walk with
Tell me why
I can't be there where you are
There's something missing in my heart
There's nowhere to run
I have no place to go
Surrender my heart' body and soul
How can it be you're asking me to feel
the things you never show
You are missing in my heart
Tell me why I can't be there where you are
Show me the meaning of being lonely
Is this the feeling I need to walk with
Tell me why
I can't be there where you are
There's something missing in my heart
Show me the meaning of being lonely
Is this the feeling I need to walk with
Tell me why
I can't be there where you are
There's something missing in my heart